I'm too old for this shi...

As I ambled back into the house around noon this morning with a mild headache, a stomach growling from hunger and the intense desire to take a shower I began thinking about my Murtaugh List. While it may not have been completely originated there, I stole the idea from watching a hilarious episode of How I met your mother (which is one of the best shows on TV by the way). I tried to find the episode to link for ya'll but its no longer on the CBS website so you'll just have to find it covertly yourself. =)

Essentially, the Murtaugh List, I believe is a summary of activities that a person has either out grown, matured out of, or can no longer do as well nor should do at all, as they did when they were younger.

I propose, that though I still feel young and look relatively spry, I will add a few items onto my own personal list.

Primarily, as a direct reflection of last night, I will no longer imbibe alcoholic beverages for 7 straight hours. I'm too old that that sh!t...


Last night I attended a bachelors party for the fiance of a childhood friend. It was quite a large gathering, I counted probably 30 fellas. So, using the quantitative multiplication properties of peer pressure combined with the microscopic bar room prices here in the Midwest; I'm sure you can deduct for yourself that the alcohol was a free flowing river of throat burning, poor decision enducing, general merriment and weapon of debauchery.

I have just woken up from a six hour nap and thankfully, I don't have a headache and I'm not really worse-for-wear (which I attribute to trying to minimize the varieties of alcohol I drank). The only thing is that I have no idea what happened to my Sunday.

If this were the movies, I would have a fantastical story to regale you with regarding my awesome nighttime adventures that culminated with me waking up in the bed of a random woman then having to find my pants, escape from a window and steal a bicycle to get home. Alas, we all know that that's not the way I roll...unfortunately.

After a great dinner, our troupe of soon to be drunken troubadours (due to the fact that there were way too many bad singers singing last night), just walked around the downtown area hopping from bar to bar. If there's one great thing about living in a big college town, its that there are numerous bars that one can stumble into in a relatively confined area.

After last call, I forsake the option to follow the groom to the customary exotic dancing establishment and headed over to a buddy's house for some beer pong and video games (these two items will NOT be placed on the bucket list). I ended up staying coherent till around 7 am trying to figure out why I suddenly really sucked at a video game I'm normally decent at - it didn't really dawn on me until later that my motor skills MAY have been impaired. I ended up crashing out at my friends house trying to get comfortable on a couch with about 6 others strewn out all over the living room.

Its pretty amazing how guys can sleep in very uncomfortable looking positions - like sitting upright on some stairs - but I guess given sufficient knockout juice (ie. lower quality, high proof tequilla) a man can sleep like a baby anywhere.

Let me just say that in a group of Filipino and white guys, its probably not wise to be the first one asleep.

OK, its nearly 7:30 pm...time to go have breakfast!