We were bamboozled!

Today in Biology lecture we covered a chapter on fermentation as it relates to cellular respiration. As we got into the commercial applications of fermentation, our professor casually mentions that we would be brewing beer in lab. A few heads did pop up with that notification.

Beer? Brewing beer? Brewing beer in lab for college! Hot-diggity-dog, what kind of academic jackpot have we hit here? While I'm not a huge fan of imbibing beer, the thought of using class time to brew alcohol is quite appealing. However, a nugget of doubt crept into my head. Maybe, I thought, maybe this was a ploy to increase attendance in lab. But no, the professor wouldn't do that; she wouldn't have fibbed would she?. This is an institution of higher learning, and by golly, if she wants to brew beer then call me San Miguel and lets get this brewery a'poppin!

After lecture I made my way towards the lab building, I was fancifully wondering if I would make a lager or an ale. I noted that the lab looked to have 100% attendance this evening. It seems that there are beer fans in class.

As we got settled, a grim realization seemed to permeate through the laboratory. We didn't see any barley, or hops, or enough hot plates to boil a lot of water. What we did see was a gallon of milk. Wait a gosh-darn-Anheuser-Busch minute. There ain't no beer making stuff here!

Hmm, what other commercial applications did we go over again? Bread, pickles, vinegar...wait, don't tell me. Don't tell me where making that. Milk...Heat...Coagulating enzymes.

FREAKING CHEESE!

We're making cheese!?!?! Instead of beer we're making cheese!?!?! I'm freaking Lactose intolerant. I hadn't had dinner yet and I can't think of anything worse than heating up milk to be able to skim off the cheese curds on a empty stomach. Let me illustrate my frustration:


Look how happy I am to be making beer! (I think I am in a monastery for some weird reason)


I think I just puked into the cheese!

Cheese!